9 Things you'ld stop keeping Secret

We all have a deep and rich inner world, and countless thoughts cross our minds every day—good and bad. Psychologists, psychiatrists, and various therapists have spent many years researching these worlds, and many people have revealed a great deal of information to them, some only after a long process and while dealing with deep feelings of shame. In a popular thread on Reddit, therapists from around the world shared the things their patients are afraid to share because they think they're weird or abnormal, even though they've heard them many times before. Hiding these details about your life from professionals in this field or from those close to you is unnecessarily harmful, so it's important to know that there's no reason to be ashamed of the following 9 things...

1. Intrusive Thoughts 

Do you sometimes think about violently attacking a rude person in the supermarket? About driving against the traffic on the Ayalon Freeway? Maybe even about stabbing a loved one in the stomach? These thoughts bring us great shame, but they are actually something that many people experience. Such intrusive thoughts about "inappropriate" content, which arise at inappropriate times (mainly in the context of violence, sexuality, or religion), sometimes cause a person to experience thought-action fusion. That is, they attribute the same significance to thinking about an action as to actually carrying it out. But it's important to remember that most people can easily shake off intrusive thoughts, so there's no reason to feel ashamed of them or to keep them a secret from therapists.

2. "Something Is Wrong with Me..." 

 

This self-perception is probably much more common than you think, and if you've ever felt this way, know that you are not alone and have no reason to be ashamed of it. Many therapists encounter people who have developed a deep-seated belief that something fundamentally unfixable is wrong with them, preventing them from fitting into society, succeeding at work, finding a relationship, etc. In some cases, this belief is so deeply rooted within them that it's hard for them to bring it to light and talk about it. However, it's very important to do so, because only by confronting this perception can one work to change the situation, and it's always worth trying.

3. Undefined Pleasure  

A person suffering from depression or going through some coping process may sometimes hear various suggestions from professionals and friends like "treat yourself to a fun day." But it may be surprising to discover that this concept is vague for many people who, for various reasons, ranging from life stress to anxiety, don't really know what brings them joy. This seems like such an illogical problem that many are ashamed to admit it, but that's not the case. There's no doubt that an evening of watching TV or resting in bed can be very relaxing, but is it truly enjoyable? Is it really what gives "fuel" to life? The answers to these questions occupy many people and are certainly important, so there's no reason to worry if you don't really know what brings you joy. 

 

4. Masks 

"I feel that if I behave like my true self, no one will like me"—therapists regularly hear some version of this feeling. Even though you might sometimes feel like you're the only one like this, in reality, almost all the people we see wear masks that present a certain version of themselves to the world, which is not necessarily who they really are. This is not a reason for shame, and it's important to emphasize that to some extent, this is a very natural and common behavior.

5. Ups and Downs  

In any process related to depression, weight maintenance, addiction, or any similar field, it's natural to experience setbacks, crises, and shame as a result. People in therapy and in general sometimes feel that they need to hide these things from their surroundings because they see them as a sort of mark of Cain, even though we all experience them. Anyone with good judgment understands that as long as a certain boundary is not crossed, this is a common and even natural scenario. Therapists even recommend not trying to suppress the focus on crises and moments of regression—one should practice self-compassion and try to learn from the past, not run away from it.

6. Parental Burnout 

Many young and even older parents who come to therapy admit at some point that they feel exhausted and fear they are not functioning well with their children. Some will even say that they regret having children, and this complaint is not uncommon, so there's no reason to think that if you sometimes feel this way, it means something is wrong with you. Parenthood is, by its very nature, hard and exhausting work, and in most cases, all that can be done is to accept this fact and try to be better parents within the possible framework.

7. Shame in the Past  

It's no big secret that we all have a past we're not always proud of, but what many are unaware of is that everyone also has "skeletons in the closet" of some kind or another. Therapists often encounter people with deep secrets from their childhood or adolescence, which they believe would shock anyone who discovers them. There are cases where hiding such secrets sometimes delays the therapeutic process a person is going through, and we must not forget the burden that such a secret creates, which weighs heavily on a person's soul. Even if you're convinced that your secret is the darkest and most embarrassing of all time, you're probably wrong and are simply judging yourself too harshly. 

 

8. Voices in the Head 

Some people sometimes struggle to identify their internal dialogue, "self-talk" that is completely natural, and mistakenly interpret it as a sign of hallucinations and serious problems. Sometimes this confusion starts out of the blue at a certain stage in life and sometimes as a result of a difficult experience that a person goes through, which stirs up unusual emotional turmoil and thoughts that they don't know how to deal with. This problem is quite common, and therapists and professionals have tools like a series of simple questions with which they can quickly determine whether it's a natural internal conversation or something more complex. In the vast majority of cases, according to the testimonies of many therapists, it's the former.

9. Lack of Progress 

Starting a process of mental therapy is not an easy step and requires commitment, but one should not let this fact create a need to lie or hide a lack of progress. Therefore, when a person receives "homework" such as thinking deeply about a certain topic or making a certain behavioral change, it is normal to struggle with it and sometimes not be able to make progress at all. Therapy is not an automatic process, and human beings are not robots, and like the other items you have read about so far, it is never a good idea to hide a lack of progress from therapists, nor from spouses or other people close to you. These difficulties are an inseparable part of making a change in life, and if you do not acknowledge them to your surroundings and yourself, you will only harm yourself, so there is no reason to do so.

This is only for your information, kindly take the advice of your doctor for medicines, exercises and so on.   

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What’s the Difference Between Impulsive vs. Intrusive Thoughts?

Too often, people say they “let their intrusive thoughts win” after spontaneously dyeing their hair or making a late-night purchase. There’s a difference between impulsive and intrusive thoughts, however—and mixing the two up is a common mistake worth clearing up for a few reasons.

At first glance, it might seem like a matter of semantics. “But misusing [these terms] can be extremely invalidating to people who actually suffer from intrusive thoughts,” which she says can be “overwhelming and anxiety-inducing.” Kaylee Bullen, LCSW, a therapist who treats obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) based in Encinatas, California, tells SELF. Beyond simply getting your language right, understanding the nuances between the two experiences can also help you manage these unexpected intrusions and impulses more effectively.

So what exactly are intrusive thoughts? And how do they differ from impulsive ones? Below, we asked experts to break down the biggest distinctions.

 

1. Intrusive thoughts are a clinical symptom of conditions like OCD.

According to Jon Abramowitz, PhD, a psychologist specializing in OCD treatment and professor of psychology and neuroscience at the University of North Carolina, Chapel Hill, intrusive thoughts are more than just in-the-moment, random ideas—they’re a legit clinical term used to describe unwelcome repetitive thoughts. Technically, anyone can experience them, but Dr. Abramowitz tells SELF that they’re much more persistent, recurring, and difficult to dismiss for folks with mental health conditions like OCD, post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), and generalized anxiety disorder.

Impulsive thoughts, on the other hand, aren’t actually a recognized psychological term. Instead, people throw it around casually to describe spontaneous, slightly chaotic ideas or actions—like cutting your bangs in your bathroom at 1 a.m., say, or licking your delicious, cookie butter-scented body lotion just because.

2. Simply having an intrusive thought can be distressing and anxiety-inducing.

Intrusive and impulsive thoughts are both involuntary and unexpected. But the way they affect someone can be very different, Alyssa Faro, PhD, director of clinical services at the Child and Adolescent OCD Institute at McLean Hospital, tells SELF.

Usually, intrusive thoughts are ego-dystonic, Bullen says, meaning they conflict with your true values and identity. For example, What if I drop this baby I’m holding? What if I just cut my finger off with this kitchen knife? What if I jump in front of this moving car? Because they’re so at odds with who you are (and what you want), “people can feel tormented by the presence of these ideas,” Dr. Faro explains, leading to strong reactions like fear, disgust, guilt, and shame. (For the record, though, having intrusive thoughts does not mean you want to act on them. More on that later.)

Impulsive thoughts, on the other hand, resemble sudden urges. While they can also be random, disruptive, and “intrude” on your mental space, they don’t carry the same emotional weight, Dr. Faro points out. In fact, these thoughts (which sound more like, Blow out that person’s birthday cake before they do! Quit your job on the spot! Sure, make that questionably inappropriate joke!) can even be tempting or momentarily appealing.

3. People will rarely act on intrusive thoughts.

All three experts agree that following through on intrusive thoughts is pretty unlikely. “I would never want to say never just because it’s a really strong word,” Dr. Abramowitz says. But because they’re unwanted by definition, most people won’t end up pushing someone in front of a train, say, or sticking their hand in a pot of boiling water.

This differs from impulsive thoughts, which are “more compelling and tend to be followed by a sudden urge to act on them without necessarily taking into consideration the consequences,” Bullen says. That’s why you might spontaneously book a weekend trip with zero planning, for instance, or randomly sing out loud in a quiet library—both of which are reckless and unplanned, sure, but not disturbing or “intrusive.”

However, saying something like, “My intrusive thoughts got the best of me” in these situations (when you’re really referring to impulsive behaviors) can unintentionally reinforce the harmful narrative that having unsettling thoughts means you’ll follow through with them, according to all three experts. “When, in fact, they fear acting on them,” Dr. Faro says.

4. Distractions work best for impulsive thoughts, but not intrusive ones.

When dealing with impulsive thoughts, distracting yourself or delaying them can be pretty effective, Dr. Faro says. For instance, if you suddenly experience the urge to get a tattoo as you walk past a parlor, waiting until the next day will likely make the temptation fade—or at least give you time to think it through and make a more intentional decision.

But for intrusive thoughts, forcing yourself to ignore them can backfire, according to every expert we spoke with. “If you try to make them go away, they’ll only come back,” Dr. Abramowitz says, comparing it to what happens when you tell yourself not to think of a pink elephant—suddenly, that’s all you picture. And with conditions like OCD, suppressing anxiety can lead to compulsive behaviors—such as repeating certain phrases or avoiding specific people or places—in an attempt to neutralize fear, which often backfires and worsens it.

Rather than pretending they don’t exist, a more effective approach is accepting intrusive thoughts for what they are: just thoughts. This might mean practicing mindfulness and reminding yourself, This is just a thought, not a reflection of who I am or what I’ll do. Or continuing with whatever you were doing before it popped up uninvited. In more serious cases, it’s also recommended to enlist the help of a therapist, who can assist you in identifying these thoughts as they arise and recommend cognitive strategies to reduce their power.

Ultimately, though, even recognizing the subtle differences between intrusive thoughts and impulsive thoughts can be a great first step in effectively managing them—and preventing them from taking up more space in your head than they deserve.

 

 

This is only for your information, kindly take the advice of your doctor for medicines, exercises and so on.   

https://gscrochetdesigns.blogspot.com. one can see my crochet creations  
https://gseasyrecipes.blogspot.com. feel free to view for easy, simple and healthy recipes    
https://kneereplacement-stickclub.blogspot.com. for info on knee replacement
https://GSiyers home remedies.blogspot.com   is the latest addition to my blogs