Guide to Relaxation
Call it what you like - Stress, tension,
anxiety or worry. It all comes down to you feeling bad both physically
and mentally. Anxiety has become one of the most prevalent forces in
modern life, with more and more people feeling overwhelmed and anxious
when dealing with the many challenges and problems life puts on their
path. When this happens, don't blame yourself, many are in the same
boat. Read this guide and you'll find there are many ways to reduce your
worries and anxiety.
Part A:Symptoms
Symptoms
If you're not sure you really are disproportionately anxious, know that
anxiety can manifest in three types of symptoms:
Emotional Symptoms
• A sudden feeling of apprehension, dread or unexplained guilt.
• Feeling worried for large periods of time without the ability to
stop the worrying thoughts.
• Intrusive thoughts about things that make you anxious even when
you're in the middle of doing something else.
• You find uncertainty intolerable, if there is a problem, you must
know about it right away.
Behavioral symptoms
• Finding it extremely hard to relax or enjoy a quiet time.
• Frequently putting things off because you feel overwhelmed.
• Avoiding situations that make you anxious.
Physical symptoms
• Feeling like your muscles are tense, that your body aches from
being held rigid.
• Having trouble either falling or staying asleep, as your mind will
not stop working.
• Feeling cranky, edgy or jumpy.
• Stomach pain, nausea, and other stomach issues often occur.
Part B: Treating the Anxiety
Step 1: Understanding what worrying really is
We often feel like our worries are generated from the outside. From
other people, problems or situations that trigger this worried anxiety
within us. But the truth is that worrying comes from within. There are
triggers all around us, but it is the anxiety machine within us that
spins it over and over again, making a running dialog that produces
worry.
Once you realize that your worries are not really helping you plan but
are just wasting valuable energy, you can start dealing with the
irrationality of these worrying thoughts. This may mean challenging
these irrational thoughts, learning to accept uncertainty, and
postponing the act of worrying.
Step 2: Physical Relaxation Techniques
A big part of anxiety is how we physically feel when it happens. Anxiety
is our body's reaction to perceived danger. It used to help us escape
predators. Our hearts pound in our chests, we breathe faster, more
shallow breaths, our muscles tense up and we feel light-headed. All
these things are great when you're escaping an angry tiger, but in
everyday life, this reaction can also be triggered by much smaller
threats, like being late to work or doing something embarrassing in
front of other people.
That is why it is important to know a few techniques to physically relax
your body. The most important thing is REPETITION AND REGULAR PRACTICE.
Set aside 30 minutes once a day, or when you're anxious, to practice
some of the following:
Progressive muscle relaxation
Start releasing all the muscles in your body. First clench your toes, as
hard as you can. Then unclench them. The move to your calves and do the
same. Repeat this for every part of your body that has muscle, working
your way from the toes to the legs, the middle of your body, up to your
arms and hands and finally neck and head. Do it patiently, give
attention to each muscle as you clench it. This will help relax your
body and with it your mind.
Deep breathing
When we're anxious, we start breathing faster, causing hyperventilation.
This, in turn, leads to symptoms such as lightheadedness, feeling out
of breath, dizziness, and tingly extremities. These scare us, creating a
loop of anxiety that gets higher and higher. By forcing your breath to
become slower, deliberate and coming from your diaphragm, you'll be
signaling to your body that it is time to relax, and you'll be surprised
how effective it can be.
Meditation
Countless studies have proven beyond doubt that there are many kinds of
meditation that lead to reduced anxiety. Meditation can not only reduce
your physical symptoms but, over time, help you control the flow of
thoughts in your head. As you gain more control over your thoughts, you
will be able to stop their persistent nagging.
Use your senses to calm yourself down quickly.
Sight: Look at something you find
beautiful, walk around somewhere pretty or look at photos that make you
feel good, such as family photos or treasured photos from your past.
Animal photos have also been proven to have a calming effect on our
psyche.
Sound: Listen to something relaxing. Slow music, the sounds of nature.
Listen to crashing waves and the wind passing through the leaves.
Smell: Certain smells reduce anxiety and promote relaxation. A great
example is lavender, which is great for relaxing both body and mind, as
well as promoting healthy sleep.
Taste: Cook yourself something delicious. Slowly eat a favorite treat.
Do NOT start treating anxiety with sugary sweets, because you will
create a sugar spike that will only lead to more anxiety later on. Not
to mention you can develop a nasty habit of calming yourself down with
fattening foods. Eat something slowly, enjoy the taste and let it
overwhelm everything else.
Touch: Take a hot, scented bath. Pet your dog or cat. Wrap yourself in
something soft like a good blanket. Enjoy a good massage or sit outside
and feel the wind caress your skin.
Step 3: Connecting with others
Being under stress, being worried and
feeling anxious is worst when you are dealing with it alone. Without any
objective feedback, everything just becomes bigger and worse in our
minds. A quick and honest evaluation from someone else can drastically
reduce the amount of time we spend obsessing and worrying over a
problem.
However, being anxious can also negatively impact your relationships
with others. You may seem cranky, or you may come across as needy and
weak. That is why many don't disclose their anxiety, fearing to be
judged.
Build a strong support system
Offer your trust and your help to others,
and use them to lean on when your anxiety gets too bad. Have people you
trust and who you find steady and calming to help you through this
difficult time.
Talk about your worries
This may sound easy, but many find it hard
to talk about their deepest, darkest anxieties because they are afraid
to make them more real. The truth is usually the opposite, and when
things come out and you tell someone about what's bothering you, it
usually makes your problem seem much smaller and a lot less scary.
Avoid those who make you feel anxious
Certain people may make us more worried and
increase our anxiety. Remember, you probably picked up your anxiety
from someone in your life, and so that person may make you more anxious
if you're around them. Similarly, some people may make you feel guilt,
shame or fear, and they too should have limited appearance time in your
life. So considering who to turn to for that talk, remember those people
that make you feel safe.
Step 4: Change your lifestyle
A huge part of our anxiety stems from improper lifestyle choices. These
can be easily fixed by:
Adopting healthy eating habits
Don't skip breakfast, and continue having
small meals throughout the day. Going too long without eating may lead
to low blood sugar levels, which will make you feel anxious and cranky.
Eat lots of complex carbs such as fruit, vegetables, and whole grains.
Limiting your caffeine and sugar intake
Carbonated drinks, coffee, and tea can increase your anxiety and disrupt
your sleep. Sugary snacks and treats will spike your blood sugar levels
and then crash, leaving you feeling drained.
Similarly, avoiding alcohol and nicotine
Alcohol may be used by many to 'drown their sorrows', but it actually
increases anxiety as it leaves you. Drinking away your worries may also
take you on the path to alcoholism. Cigarettes may seem like they have a
calming effect, but, in fact, are stimulants, even powerful ones, and
will eventually lead you to more anxiety, not less.
Getting enough sleep
We can't stress this enough. A lack of sleep or disrupted sleep will
have a terrible effect on your anxiety and will always make it worse.
Also, your ability to deal with anxiety and with problems, in general,
will decrease once you are sleep deprived, which will, in turn, make you
feel helpless, increasing the anxiety.
Part C: When should you seek professional help?
Knowing the difference between being worried and having a condition is
hard. What started as normal worrying can become what's known as
'General Anxiety Disorder' or GAD. People who suffer from GAD cannot
stop worrying, and this worry becomes a normal state for them. GAD is a
well-known condition and is very common these days, especially in
Western society. It can be handled with either medication or therapy.
The first and most important sign that you need to seek some help is the
length of time you've been feeling anxious. If you have been having
this feeling for over six months, that's a clear sign that something is
wrong and that you need some actual help.
Another sign is that your worries are significantly disrupting your
everyday life, job, relationship or other social activities.
So if you find that you can't stop worrying, and nothing you do will
stop these obsessive thoughts and tense muscles. Please don't try to
fight it alone. Never be ashamed to ask for help. It is not your fault,
it's a fault in your brain chemistry that you have no control over. Do
the brave thing and go seek some medical assistance.